Joe Versus The Volcano
Joe Banks (Tom Hanks) is a downtrodden everyman, working in a factory for an unpleasant, demanding boss, Frank Waturi (Dan Hedaya). Joyless, listless, and chronically sick, Banks regularly visits doctors who can find nothing physically wrong until finally Dr. Ellison (Robert Stack) diagnoses a fatal, incurable "brain cloud" unrelated to Joe's complaints. Ellison believes these were psychosomatic, caused by frightening experiences in Joe's previous job as a fireman. The brain cloud has no symptoms, but will kill him in six months. Ellison advises him: "You have some life left... live it well." Joe tells his boss off, quits his job, and asks former co-worker DeDe (Meg Ryan) out on a date. It goes well, until he tells her he's dying; she becomes upset and leaves.
The next day, a wealthy manufacturer named Samuel Graynamore (Lloyd Bridges) makes Joe a proposition. Graynamore needs to mine deposits of "bubaru" on the tiny Pacific island of Waponi Wu as a raw material for superconductors. The Waponis will let him mine the mineral if he can solve a problem for them. They believe that the volcano on their island must be appeased by a voluntary human sacrifice once every century, but none of the Waponis is willing to volunteer this time around. If Graynamore can provide someone, he can have the mineral. Graynamore offers Joe the opportunity to "live like a king, die like a man." He offers Joe credit cards to pay for whatever he wants, as long as he jumps into the volcano at the end. With nothing to lose, Joe agrees.
Joe spends a day and a night on the town in New York, where he solicits advice on style and life from his wise chauffeur, Marshall (Ossie Davis). Among other things, Joe purchases four top-of-the-line, handcrafted, waterproof steamer trunks from a fanatically dedicated luggage salesman (Barry McGovern).
Joe then flies to Los Angeles, where he is met by one of Graynamore's daughters, Angelica (also played by Ryan), a flighty socialite. The next morning, Angelica takes Joe to a yacht owned by her father. The captain is her half-sister, Patricia (Ryan again). She had reluctantly agreed to take Joe to Waponi Woo after Graynamore promised to give her the yacht in return.
After an awkward beginning, Joe and Patricia begin to bond. Then they run into a typhoon. Patricia is knocked unconscious and flung overboard. While Joe is rescuing her, lightning strikes and sinks the yacht. Fortunately, Joe is able to construct a raft by lashing together his steamer trunks. Patricia does not regain consciousness for several days. Joe doles out the small supply of water to her, while he gradually becomes delirious from thirst. Joe experiences a revelation during his delirium and thanks God for his life. When Patricia finally awakens, she is deeply touched that Joe gave her all the water. They then find that they have fortuitously drifted to their destination.
The Waponis treat them to a grand feast. Their chief (Abe Vigoda) asks one last time if anyone else will volunteer, but there are no takers and Joe heads for the volcano. Patricia tries to stop him, declaring her love for him. He admits he loves her as well, "but the timing stinks." Patricia gets the chief to marry them.
Afterwards, Patricia refuses to be separated from Joe. When he is unable to dissuade her, they jump in together, but the volcano erupts at that moment, blowing them out into the ocean. The island sinks, but Joe and Patricia are rescued by their trusty steamer trunks again. At first ecstatic about their miraculous salvation, Joe puts a damper on things by telling Patricia about his fatal brain cloud. She recognizes the name of Joe's doctor as that of her father's crony and realizes that Joe has been lied to. He isn't dying and they can live happily ever after (if they can survive being on a raft in the middle of the ocean).
